I feel the site is not funny enough:

A tiny goblin just crept out of my boxer shorts and shot me with a rubber band. In amazement, I asked him his name. He said "George Bush's conscience."

I said to him "Why are you crawling around in my shorts and shooting me with rubber bands instead of administering your duties to the president?"

He replied "I'm off duty until the cocaine wears off."

At this point, Erin Wilson teleported into my apartment and beat both myself and the goblin to a bloody pulp. When I asked her why she beat me as well as the goblin, she said "Because this shit isn't funny, Weber-Flink."

I agreed, and a single tear trickled down my cheek.

The End.