Monday, February 23, 2004

Courtesy of Gabe:

"Such events are dispensed by a dark Santa who hails from a future without Christmas."

If he gave me the rights to that I think I could turn it into a great novel. Terry Prachett-style.

You snivelling pool of diseased rhinocerous pizzle.

NOW NOW, THAT'S NOT PARTICULARLY FRIENDLY.

Eh? Er? Wot? ... Uh, right, then. Er, look, can we just forget the bit about diseased rhinocerous pizzle? Please?

THAT'S BETTER.

Er? Wot? Uh, yes, hmmmm, indeed. Well I think I shall trot down to the local boulangerie, as itwere, have a piece of Mrs. Frumpberry's 18-Tier All You Can Drink Chocolate Infusion Cake.

RUN ALONG, THEN.

W00t!

New blogroll entry!

Lee, Stacy, Erin...

I feel your pain this morning. But don't worry! That's what dvd is for!

Friday, February 20, 2004

News!

Imagine, if you will, a newly refurnished apartment. It has a spacious, carpeted common room with bay windows and a balcony suitable for 10 people. There are brick walls and hardwood floors in the rest of the space.

Imagine a beautiful kitchen with finished marble countertops and hanging lights.

Imagine 2 bedrooms, a large bath, and a washer/dryer.

Imagine the rent is 1300 a month.

Now imagine she's white. [1pt]

Oops, sorry.

So I'm moving in there with Annie in June, and it's going to be da figurative bomb, yo.

*Jordan is Happy*

Thursday, February 12, 2004

Queer Eye For The Straight Ruling

Whether called a marriage or something else, Justice Sosman wrote, "same-sex couples who are civilly `united' will have literally every single right, privilege, benefit and obligation of every sort that our state law confers on opposite-sex couples who are civilly `married.' "


Hmm. Sounds like 'separate but equal' to me.

"The dissimilitude between the terms `civil marriage' and `civil union' is not innocuous," Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall wrote. "It is a considered choice of language that reflects a demonstrable assigning of same-sex, largely homosexual, couples to second-class status."


Damn, I am proud of Massachusetts today.

Wednesday, February 11, 2004

Casper Has Great Dental Hygiene

Last night Casper pulled a piece of dental floss out of the garbage and ate it - I glanced over at him as the last bit of it went down his gullet. After a shocked moment, I laughed for about 2 minutes. The little guy is constantly amusing. I think he likes mint, too.

Monday, February 09, 2004

Morons

This is too funny. Casey, I expect to see this on ToTC, it's too good to keep to my meager readership :)

RFC

Since IANAL, and have only a cursory high-school understanding of the Constitution, I'd appreciate comments about the validity of my statements below. Bobh, perhaps?

N.B. "IANAL" is a common internet acronym for "I Am Not A Lawyer". RFC is a comp. sci. / engineering acronym for "Request For Comments".

Saturday, February 07, 2004

Liberal Rant

If marriage is sanctified, then it is religious and cannot be regulated by the government, as set forth in the Constitution under separation of church and state. Adding an amendment stating that legal marriage means adherence to the religious view of marriage would introduce a fundamental inconsistency into that document, which is the very foundation of our nation.

If it is a legal issue, then to add a Constitutional amendment stating that marriage is defined as the union of man and woman only would be to introduce an even more fundamental flaw in the fabric of the Constitution, for to say that gay and lesbian human beings do not feel love as we do, or cannot, or do not deserve the same benefits thereof, is to contradict the statement that all men are created equal.

Neither of these scenarios is acceptable for the future of this country, and until the people who fear an increasingly gay-friendly America either wake up or die off, there will be a dangerous undercurrent of unrest adding to the already strained social tension of this nation. Why can't these goddamn people grok the concept that the only life they are allowed to live is their own?

Despite all the clever rhetoric, it all comes back to which version of the bible they read. It's a different kind of fundamentalism but it's just as bad in a different way.

Thursday, February 05, 2004

I'm Curious

Do girls enforce the Buffer Rule in the restroom?

I suppose I should preface that by asking whether girls even know about the Buffer Rule.

The Buffer Rule states that when sharing a restroom with another person, a male shall always endeavor whenever possible to keep a buffer between himself and the other person.

So if there are 3 urinals and one guy is on the right-most, the newcomer will almost invariably use the left-most. It is acceptable to use the middle urinal only in the case where the other two are taken.

The corollary to the Buffer Rule is that if you are the first one in a bathroom, you always use an "edge" urinal so that if some other person comes in during your pee, they will not be forced to break the Rule.

Some guys enforce the rule so adamantly that unless there is a long line (like at a football game) they will fuck around and primp their hair or something until a buffered urinal becomes available.

The Rule is not as strictly enforced when dropping the kids off at the pool, especially around 9:30am; however it's generally agreed that when a buffer is available it will be used.

So, do girls know about / follow the tennets of the Buffer Rule?

Monday, February 02, 2004

Gasp, gasp...

Casper has this dime he trots around carrying in his mouth. He just dropped it in my glass of water.

I'm dying of laughter here, people.

Sunday, February 01, 2004

!!!

Two years ago we were lucky. Tonight we are a dynasty!