A Real Conversation

Erin: so do we need to buy a new vaccum?
me: yes
Erin: i'm making a list for sunday
what did you do to it?
3:03 PM me: i cleaned it out, completely disassembled it and put it back together and there was still no suction
i took about half a pound of your hair out of it
Erin: :)
well i think we should try to have it fixed - i'm guessing it wasn't cheap
me: that would be an option if i hadn't thrown it away
3:04 PM Erin: i hate you
me: we need a new one
Erin: well now we do
me: oh, i'm sorry, you hate me?
Erin: yes
me: perhaps you'
Erin: yes....?
me: perhaps you'd like to move two people's worth of stuff across town by yourself while I go home to relax, and then we'll talk about who hates who
Erin: two things
3:05 PM you know that really just makes us even for all the stuff i've done in the last year
and two, i'm going to end up unpacking it all and setting up the apt.
and i'm unhateable
me: that's three things you dumb girl
3:06 PM Erin: the third was more of an afterthought
jerkwad
me: i can understand that
takes one to have one
Erin: i hate you
me: you better love me, i've got your keys
3:07 PM skankwad
Erin: hmm, a good point
me: what, that i have your keys or that you are a skankwad?
either way it's nice that you agree
Erin: yes, i agreed that i'm a skankwad
3:08 PM me: ...
blogger here i come

UPDATE:
Erin: i'm going to kick you in the balls so hard when i get home
me: ahahahahaha